subcontinental blues
the subcontinent - well the subcontinent's biggest nations, atleast - have outdone themselves at the world cup. it's hard to tell whose collective assholes are sagging more because of all the buttfucking, india's or pakistan's.
the men in green are staying back in jamaica due to important social engagements with members of the jamaican police force.
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. we are to beeing in troubles sirji?
jamaican cop: yaa maan. you have noo idea.
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. we are beeing waiting in hotels. are we in arrested?
jamaican cop: noo maan. you jus' bein' aksed to waait whahle wee find out what youse bin doin' wid ol' bob.
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. so how we are beeing in troubles sirji, if we are nots in arrested?
jamaican cop: weell leftenant curtly over dere, he found dis bag in mr. mohamed yoosoof's room durin' a randome search. he was lookin' in de drawers - de room's, not mr. yoosoof's - and what does he find dere but a bag of de smelliest indian ganja. what youse goin' t' say about dat, mr. inzy?
inzy: BISMILLAH-IRAHMAN-I-RAHIM! what i am to be saying? where i am to be putting my faces?!
jamaican cop: you be puttin' your faces in de loo maan or dere will be a charge of litterin' an' no mistake...
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. dekhiye sirji things is, mohammed-bhai is recantly beeing kufr. now he is being one of the team, but it is maybe to beeing hard forgets the kufr habits...
jamaican cop: i tink youse should have a cahnversation wid 'im m' maan, yaa. dat indian ganja is noo good at ahl, noo. now if youse waant some reeal good ganja wid de t'roo blessin's of ras tafari, mebbe you cahl dis numbah - here's a caard - and aks for skully. hell hook you up with some of real t'roo believer stuff y'know what ah'm sayin'?
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim! i be knows whats you are saying sirji. buts if i be wantings good maal, why i calls the skully-shully? i call the musharraf and he bees sending onlee besht-to-besht afghani creems. you wanting? i selling cheap.
jamaican cop: noo waay maan?
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. waay, dude.
on a serious note, bob woolmer r.i.p. i think he failed to understand that it isn't a sport around these parts. it's a business and a religion and as any student of history will tell you, most of the times they're the same thing.
and the men in blue? back in the indian camp, things are almost as hunky-dory. the worst the players can expect are terminated ad contracts and reduced tv time. what a bunch of fucking pussies. seriously. i can't even begin to express my contempt for these pathetic losers. there is not a shred of consistency in performance, not a shred of fire in their body language. there's no point to threatening them because everyone knows that senior players won't be affected. it'll be the small fry that will, well, get fried.
and really, who gives a shit? the bcci? ya think? sharad pawar is sitting on one of the biggest money-making enterprises in india. do you really think he's going to rock the boat?
i'm really hoping that the real reaction to this is a fall in cricket's popularity. even if it begins now and shows results later. seriously. it's time hockey and football got the attention they deserve. or maybe our ever-ignored athletes who still compete at the state-level without shoes, and in ankle-length skirts. if you've participated in state-level competitions you know exactly what i'm talking about. anything would be better, even carrom.
on the positive side, advertisers and channels stand to lose about 150 crore rupees because india aren't making. suckers!
ooh-aah india anyone?
the men in green are staying back in jamaica due to important social engagements with members of the jamaican police force.
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. we are to beeing in troubles sirji?
jamaican cop: yaa maan. you have noo idea.
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. we are beeing waiting in hotels. are we in arrested?
jamaican cop: noo maan. you jus' bein' aksed to waait whahle wee find out what youse bin doin' wid ol' bob.
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. so how we are beeing in troubles sirji, if we are nots in arrested?
jamaican cop: weell leftenant curtly over dere, he found dis bag in mr. mohamed yoosoof's room durin' a randome search. he was lookin' in de drawers - de room's, not mr. yoosoof's - and what does he find dere but a bag of de smelliest indian ganja. what youse goin' t' say about dat, mr. inzy?
inzy: BISMILLAH-IRAHMAN-I-RAHIM! what i am to be saying? where i am to be putting my faces?!
jamaican cop: you be puttin' your faces in de loo maan or dere will be a charge of litterin' an' no mistake...
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. dekhiye sirji things is, mohammed-bhai is recantly beeing kufr. now he is being one of the team, but it is maybe to beeing hard forgets the kufr habits...
jamaican cop: i tink youse should have a cahnversation wid 'im m' maan, yaa. dat indian ganja is noo good at ahl, noo. now if youse waant some reeal good ganja wid de t'roo blessin's of ras tafari, mebbe you cahl dis numbah - here's a caard - and aks for skully. hell hook you up with some of real t'roo believer stuff y'know what ah'm sayin'?
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim! i be knows whats you are saying sirji. buts if i be wantings good maal, why i calls the skully-shully? i call the musharraf and he bees sending onlee besht-to-besht afghani creems. you wanting? i selling cheap.
jamaican cop: noo waay maan?
inzy: bismillah-i-rahman-i-rahim. waay, dude.
on a serious note, bob woolmer r.i.p. i think he failed to understand that it isn't a sport around these parts. it's a business and a religion and as any student of history will tell you, most of the times they're the same thing.
and the men in blue? back in the indian camp, things are almost as hunky-dory. the worst the players can expect are terminated ad contracts and reduced tv time. what a bunch of fucking pussies. seriously. i can't even begin to express my contempt for these pathetic losers. there is not a shred of consistency in performance, not a shred of fire in their body language. there's no point to threatening them because everyone knows that senior players won't be affected. it'll be the small fry that will, well, get fried.
and really, who gives a shit? the bcci? ya think? sharad pawar is sitting on one of the biggest money-making enterprises in india. do you really think he's going to rock the boat?
i'm really hoping that the real reaction to this is a fall in cricket's popularity. even if it begins now and shows results later. seriously. it's time hockey and football got the attention they deserve. or maybe our ever-ignored athletes who still compete at the state-level without shoes, and in ankle-length skirts. if you've participated in state-level competitions you know exactly what i'm talking about. anything would be better, even carrom.
on the positive side, advertisers and channels stand to lose about 150 crore rupees because india aren't making. suckers!
ooh-aah india anyone?
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